How to Get over 20s (or 30s, 40s, 50s…) Regret | The Thirtysomething Coach™
Avoid these, and you'll be much better off for it in your 30s and beyond. I wasted years of my life with women who I knew were not a good fit for me . Also, when meeting people for the first time, maintain eye contact until. If you're 23 and live with your partner, or 31 and have an active Grindr is going to tell you that you're wasting something; your youth or your time. your mids for meeting someone, and your late 20s to early 30s are for. You've got your 30's and 40's and 50's to do that. Don't waste your 20's on grinding away at traditionally career-oriented stuff. met a wonderful woman who's 5 months pregnant with our firstborn, I've been asked (!) to lead.
People getting rich in their 20's is an aberration. That's like the rhetoric about careers. People just get lazy. What people have going for them in their 20's is no commitment and all the time in the world. But no experience which can also be a disadvantage. You're more likely to be successful as an actor in your 30's for the same reasons!
While it's true that those in their 30s or older can be closed to new idea, that's not because they're "old", it's because they're people and some people are closed-minded. I find a lot of these complaints are more about the cultural and lifestyle gap between those in their 20s and those who are older. I remember the 80s. I'm not particularly interested in going bar-hopping. I find most social media to be an annoying drivel from people who vary between exhibitionists to just liking the sound of their own voices everybody is talking, nobody is listening.
I don't have that same sense of enthusiasm because for me everything isn't new. Most things really are derivative.
10 Life Lessons to Excel in Your 30s | Mark Manson
To paraphrase something Don Draper said, I've reached a point on my life where I think I've basically met every kind of person there is. That's not to say that people can't surprise you. It's just that you realize they're not as different as they once seemed. This is exacerbated in the startup world since so many are cut from the same cloth: It's a whittled down group of the technocratic elite who often-times don't really know how privileged and lucky they are. At Google there tends to be two kinds of people: And those that haven't and think this is just how the world is.
I don't begrudge them their successes and accomplishments but it is a form of cultural isolation--even inbreeding.
All of this means there tends to be a smaller set of common social norms with the "20s set". At the same time, I pick up new technologies, languages and frameworks as much as I ever did. Just now I've been doing a lot of AngularJS. That certainly didn't exist in my 20s.
While I may not have the same youthful exuberance, I have experience and can draw lessons and parallels from programming in every stage of the Web's development from CGI scripts on. I will say this to those planning to have children: Children simply take an enormous amount of energy and commitment and this is far easier to bounce back from the younger you are. As for the rest of it? Take another comment on this thread: I'm 43 years old today.
Some things just feel uninteresting because I started doing them too young. Interestingly programming is not one of them, I have been doing it for 30 years.
On the other hand, I have been rock climbing for 7 years and I'm better than ever [in case you care: It still feels pretty new to me. I know year-olds who started climbing as kids, reached their potential and lost interest.
Everyone is different, every decade in a person's life is different. In my personal case, my work between 30 and 40 was far better than what I did between 20 and I feel pretty inspired right now. This type of post is the stuff that you want to say to yourself at every point in your life you can only make the best of the present, after all.
It doesn't really work as advice to others. Isn't what you are doing in the video called bouldering? Do you usually climb in your jeans?
I am wondering does it allow you required flexibility? Do you work on your core for climbing or climbing works your core? What would you say about artificial walls and bouldering arenas for a beginner? Way OT but let's do this. Yes that is bouldering, but bouldering is a subset of rock climbing, as is sport climbing. Bouldering is frequently about balance and power, for some problems flexibility isn't as crucial.
I climb in jeans outdoors, sometimes it's the best option as rock can quickly cut through lighter materials. My jeans are skinny and stretchy. But I did something else. I sent an email out to my subscribers subscribe here and asked readers age 37 and older what advice they would give their year-old selves. The idea was that I would crowdsource the life experience from my older readership and create another article based on their collective wisdom.
The result was spectacular. I received over responses, many of which were over a page in length. It took me a solid three days to read through them all and I was floored by the quality of insight people sent. So first of all, a hearty thank you to all who contributed and helped create this article. While going through the emails what surprised me the most was just how consistent some of the advice was.
The same pieces of advice came up over and over and over again in different forms across literally s of emails. It seems that there really are a few core pieces of advice that are particularly relevant to this decade of your life.
Below are 10 of the most common themes appearing throughout all of the emails. The majority of the article comprises dozens of quotes taken from readers.
10 Life Lessons to Excel in Your 30s
Some are left anonymous. Others have their age listed. Retirement planning is not something to put off. There were a few categories this advice fell into: Make it your top priority to pay down all of your debt as soon as possible. Stash away a portion of every paycheck, preferably into a k, an IRA or at the least, a savings account.
Quit spending, pay off your debt and start saving. I would have been more diligent about a retirement fund, because now mine looks pretty small. Saving is so easy and so fun! And then there were the readers who were just completely screwed by their inability to save in their 30s.
They later got divorced and she soon ran into health problems, draining all of the money she received in the divorce settlement.
She, too, now lives paycheck to paycheck, slowly waiting for the day social security kicks in. The point was clear: One woman emailed me saying that she had worked low-wage jobs with two kids in her 30s and still managed to sock away some money in a retirement fund each year. Because she started early and invested wisely, she is now in her 50s and financially stable for the first time in her life.
You just have to do it. We all know to eat better and sleep better and exercise more and blah, blah, blah. But just as with the retirement savings, the response from the older readers was loud and unanimous: Their points were pretty much all the same: This is the decade to slow down that breakage. The key to salad is to laugh while eating it. These were emails from cancer survivors, heart attack survivors, stroke survivors, people with diabetes and blood pressure problems, joint issues and chronic pain.
Did I Waste My Twenties or Did I Beast Them?
They all said the same thing: I made excuses then. But I had no idea. After calls to take care of your health and your finances, the most common piece of advice from people looking back at their year-old selves was an interesting one: And in fact, it often makes it worse.
Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind. You matter, and your presence matters. Unfortunately, the older you get, well, things start to happen, and it will affect those closest to you. You can get money back and jobs back, but you can never get time back.
Be the person that others can count on when it does. I think that between 30 and 40 is the decade when a lot of shit finally starts to happen that you might have thought never would happen to you or those you love. Parents die, spouses die, babies are still-born, friends get divorced, spouses cheat… the list goes on and on.
We believe that we have all of the time in the world. I myself remember having illusions that my website would be my first career of many. Little did I know that it took the better part of a decade to even get competent at this.
You can simply get more done in life if you focus on one thing and do it really well. It takes a lot of sacrifice to achieve anything special in life. It may mean ditching a career they spent a decade building and giving up money they worked hard for and became accustomed to.
Which brings us to… 6. The individuals that I have seen with the biggest regrets during this decade are those that stay in something that they know is not right.
It is such an easy decade to have the days turn to weeks to years, only to wake up at 40 with a mid-life crisis for not taking action on a problem they were aware of 10 years prior but failed to act. As someone on my Facebook page responded: